Wrapping Up Production

We wrapped up shooting this past Sunday. Some of it was a tight fit, and I’m a little nervous about the edit, but deadlines demand that we move on from production.

We spent the last day shooting outside, braving the freezing wind with periodic sprints to the car for lens changes and nutrigrain bars. Just five of us total that day to ensure that we could fit in the vehicle and move about easily. It was the least structured, least planned aspect of the script; which throws me in hot water but actually placed my DP where she felt most comfortable: making intuitive decisions in the moment. She definitely came through in that respect and I was counting on it.

The day before I walked the talent and AD through my annotations for the climactic scene, and not for the first time. We shot it last, and my exhaustion was both evident and necessary. The drive in the camera was being a fool and we did lose a couple of takes, but that’s the only loss of assets we experienced for our very first feature length film, and to be honest, I consider that I victory. I’m tremendously lucky to have worked on this project but it’s too early to celebrate. I have two and a half months to complete an edit, build a press kit and screen it. I’m optimistic that I was able to get this far, and I genuinely believe that anything is possible if it’s destined to happen.

I’m hosting a workshop on characterization this afternoon, and I’m up to my eyes in schoolwork. I couldn’t be more grateful for all the help that’s been offered to me in regards to this project, and to those who are invested in following my progress all along.

Peace,

Ayah

#DeltaPhiFilm

Returning to your Passion After a Break

Sometimes you have to finish something not because you have anything new to offer it, but because it has something to offer you. If we jumped up and abandoned our commitments every time we ran out of novelty, we wouldn’t learn anything.

Starting anything new is fun. You’re full of inspiration and ideas. Every moment you spend on it, whether it’s a relationship or a project, feels like an act of self expression, and that’s because it is. You’re giving a lot in the beginning, and it’s fun. A huge part of maintaining stamina for a long project is getting rest from it.

After getting a break, though, the project seems smaller.

When you are inside a problem, everything aspect of it is big and important. After stepping away it seems trivial. You can’t see the consequence of what you’re doing. It seems to have no purpose. All the effort, time and even vulnerability that you invested in the project suddenly seems like a waste, and that is hard to confront.

This presents an enormous challenge when you’re trying to get back in the game. Some people find this haunting them not only for a single project, but in returning to a particular lifestyle or art practice. We get disillusioned by more experience and even desire for more experience.

The novelty won’t necessarily come back when you get back to work. In fact, it’s likely that it won’t. What happens may not be as exciting but it is at least as valuable: if you insist on returning to your passion, it will have something entirely new to teach you about yourself. You’ll get sudden insights or understandings. You’ll have an easy opportunity to face things about yourself. Some that were difficult and too hard to bear before, and some that were great but just hidden from view.

Incremental Success

Great success can be found through incremental efforts. I asked my team to write for twenty minutes a day this week about their experience working on Delta Phi. I’m completely confident that this will give them clarity about the film and about their own goals going forward. I myself have been setting aside half an hour every day this year to write about and research metafiction, and the amount of certainty I felt after just a week has me advocating for this method. One insight a day, even one every two days, gives you real progress in a month. I’ve always written every day, but setting aside focused time dedicated to a particular project or practice is something that I’ve neglected during other productions.

This past Sunday we had one of our longest days yet, and successfully gathered assets for four different scenes, including one reshoot. The holiday break refreshed all of us and made us sharper. We got to shoot in one of our more comfortable locations, and the beautiful weather brought out even more affection and generosity of spirit than usual. I did not move one from a shot until every member of the team was completely satisfied with the last take, and I can hardly believe how much we got through. Footage came out beautiful and strange, like minerals carved out of an imagined cave. Left me feeling in love and excited and a little nervous about sharing this thing.

All that said, it only goes to show how important rest is to making good work, particularly for long term projects. I know that the few of you reading this are likely still neck deep in your own projects. How’s it going? What are you making? Let me know in the comments.

Peace,

Ayah

#DeltaPhiFilm